Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Winner and Random Dozen

And the WINNER is:

skoots1mom from MY HANDS...HIS GLORY!

Congratulations! I know you will enjoy the book, Sisterchicks in Wooden Shoes.

Thanks to all who entered the contest to be the next winner of I Won...You Win! You'll have another chance at skoots1mom's blog when she finishes reading.


Am joining Lid at 2nd Cup of Coffee for her Wednesday meme:

1. Define a great relationship.

A great relationship is the one that availed itself to me the moment I first believed that Jesus Christ is Lord. I've actually had my expectations of relationships with people set too high all these years and am only now learning that there is only One who desires me and adores me fully and forever, who loves me and will be waiting for me with open arms when my life on earth is done. I'm working on getting to know this Lover of my Soul better. It is the most important relationship I will ever have.

2. Why is it called a "drive-through" if you have to stop? (Real question: What was the last food/drink you purchased at a drive-through?)

I drove through Biggby about a month or more ago and got a free cup of coffee. French fries and big, juicy burgers taste so good, but I can't handle the aftereffects, in my old age. So, no drive through food for me anymore. It's sad. Can someone please start a whole foods, gluten-free, lactose free, vegetable laden, low sodium, no MSG, locally grown organic, all you can eat for $5 drive through?

3. As I type this, the Butler Bulldogs are getting ready to play in the NCAA championship game. Every Hoosier is hysterical about this except me. So in honor of the Bulldogs ... what is your favorite breed of dog? (I tried.)

My parents, my sisters, their husbands, my nephew, my family were all together and rooting for Michigan State on Saturday, of course. We were depressed at the end of that game. If I could get a puppy, it would be no more than 8 weeks old, medium sized, not shed much, be smart, highly trainable and energetic and it would come from the animal shelter. I don't know what breed that would be.

4. If you had to move to a state besides the one you currently live in, where would you move?

Ohio, this fall. I'd get an apartment just down the street from my daughter's dorm. I've seriously considered this, but the family says, "mom, there's something terribly wrong with you..." Maybe there is.

5. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

My parents loved each other and they loved me, my two sisters and my brother. I had a carefree childhood and cannot remember ever wanting much of anything more than I already had, though we were not wealthy. We were rich in the way that really mattered. I wouldn't change anything- though I wish I'd been more helpful to my mother and less selfish as a teenager.

6. Who's the funniest person you know?

Lidna

7. Did you get enough sleep last night?

No. I haven't been sleeping lately. My mind is full of memories of days gone by. I think it's the end of the era that I am facing. The era where I stay home with my children, read to them, take them on field trips, try to learn the word of God with them, vacation, homeschool. When did these kids grow up and leave? I'm having a hard time getting over it. Not sure what I'm supposed to be doing now.

8. What's the first thing you thought about this morning?

Honestly, I sadly woke up with the same thoughts I fell asleep with- "maybe I didn't do the best possible job with these kids, maybe we could have done something different that would have been the ultimate best...." I don't know why I am plagued with these thoughts. The kiddos are doing great- the boys live on their own and have jobs and are happy, the girl is about to graduate and go to college. I'm trying to remember to thank the Lord and trust Him with every detail. I am trying.

9. Grilled or Fried? --HONESTLY

Love fried. Can't eat it very well. We grill nightly in the summer. Love that!

10. Are you afraid of the dark?

Shouldn't be, but probably mostly am- like in the really dark dark. Like in the caves of Kentucky with the lights out dark.

11.When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

I still have the report we had to do on this in 6th grade. I wanted to be a writer or a florist or a social worker. I job shadowed a florist friend of my mom and dad's one day. That was fun. I've never been a florist and I am not a writer. But I like to write. I think I may be a social networker.

12. If you had one word to describe yourself , what would you choose?

Unsettled.


Heidi

20 comments:

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

Beautifully done, Heidi. You bring humor and poignancy to a dumb old meme! You know that I totally relate to where you're coming from re the kids. Every thoughtful parent is going to have questions and regrets. Just stop your negative thoughts immediately and focus on good characteristics, etc. just as wisely as you did right here. Loved your answers, thanks for playing.

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh...I can totally identify with you on so many of your answers!

My oldest will be leaving for college in August. Of course, it's different...my oldest and your youngest. But I get what you're saying. When she was looking at Rollins College (a fabo college in Florida), I totally wanted to pack up and leave with her. Of course, she's decided to attend a different college, and we're arguing about mother-daughter stuff like most mothers and daughters, and I can't say I'm going to be totally sad to see her leave.

That said, I know there's going to be a weird emptiness in the house when she leaves, even though I'll still have my son home.

However, I am getting ready to start a new adventure...hoping to get a teaching position for the Fall...my first after graduating college a couple of years ago.

I think what you need to do is find a new focus. It sounds like for so many years, your primary focus has been your children...your family. I don't know if there's a ministry you can devote more time to at church. I do know that God will reveal His plans to you.

Hugs!!

Robin Lambright said...

I have to tell ya, having experienced feeling of unsettled-ness it is very disruptive to the peace that the heart craves. Motherhood drives us to constantly ponder if we did the right thing or if we have done enough. But my sweet accountability sisters always remind me that God loves my children even more than I do and his desires for them pale by comparison to my worldly concerns. Letting go and letting God is by far the most difficult thing we as moms will ever do!

Blessings and prayers for a clam and peaceful spirit are heading your way!

Robin

PS: Super excited about skoots1mom being the winner. I have been wondering if I would ever get to see the book again. Now that she has won I am very excited to go over to her house and see all the comments and things that the different winners have written in the margins.

R

Skoots1moM said...

OOOOOOOhhhhhhh, can ya c me DANCIN'? I'm SO pumped...woo to the Hoooooo!
So eager to see everyone's comments...and read the book. It'll be a great read, I know!
:)
did I ask...can ya c me dancin'??

Joyce said...

I was with my college aged daughters this weekend. I asked if I could just stay for the next month on a sleeping bag on their floor? It is hard. But its also got moments of wonderfulness (is that a word?)...I am trying to figure out what to do with myself so I can relate to that as well. Focus on the successful job you've done...I'm happy my children are independent and able to build a life away from mom and dad. We are still a huge part of their world but I'm glad they are their own person now too.

I also found the anticipation of an empty nest was harder than the reality. Our kids are so electronic and communicating is much easier...no standing in line for a pay phone like when I went to school.

The empty nest thing has some bright spots too : )

Sorry for the ramble...

Skoots1moM said...

desires me/adores me/Lover of my Soul: you ARE his most-cherished creation :)

Biggby...don't know it.

highly trainable...is what i'm going for also :)

Ohio in the Fall is BEAUTIFUL...great choice!

more helpful to my mother...boy, i could have done that better myself :)

end of the era...my dd is graduating this year and will be moving on, I'm sure...it is TOUGH.
supposed to be doing now...get busy helping someone who CAN'T do things for themselves or because of their situation. You'll be a BLESSING to them :)

boys living on their own...what a blessing...and have jobs...double blessing. It's ok to be in a grieving state during so much change. If it lingers too much though without your reaching out to others, you might want to talk with your physician or gynecologist...there are many ways you can get some help to get over the humps... :)

caves of Kentucky...my daddy always like cave exploring...but NOT me. not gonna go there

writer,florist, or social worker...all speak to your compassion for people.

Having been the certain, changeless, constant, fixed, lasting, reliable guide for them...and with their taking on THEIR own responsibilities, I think it's somewhat normal to FEEL unsettled...
you hang in there ;) we'll get thru this 2gether

My ADHD Me said...

1. Thanks for the reminder that there IS a perfect relationship!!

2. HAHA! I believe there is such a drive through. It is called a toll booth.

3. If you find such a dog, let me know and I'll adopt his/her brother or sister. If my dog sneaks out of the gate one more time I am going to have a complete spastic meltdown!!

4. Oh I really really do understand where you are coming from. I think we should all plant little GPS monitors into our kids while they are asleep. There is nothing wrong with you...nothing at all!!

5. That is probably one of the nicest things I have every read. And don't worry about the teenage thing. I think it is one of a teenagers jobs to be selfish.

6. I LOVE her sense of humor!!

7. I am SO in-tune to your answers today! I also have no idea what I am supposed to be doing now. hhmmm. Probably should be doing the dishes, but other than that...

8. STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT!
We all doubt what we did with our kids and worry about how we did but your answer proves that you did a great job as they are doing wonderfully.
Don't make me come over there and shake those thoughts out of you! :)

9. Love fried too. They probably sell healthy fried food at that imaginary drive through you were talking about.

10. Do you spend a lot of time in the caves of Kentucky with the lights out? Just wondering. lol.

11. Even artificial flowers die under my care. A social networker....what a great title for you. Unfortunately, you strike me as the type that would worry about other peoples problems as if they were your own.....stop doing that!

12. Could I be "Unsettled...The Sequel"?

I've said it before but I love reading your blog. Your honesty is refreshing and I always leave with a good feeling inside. (I'd feel even better if you could find our where to get that HEALTHY fried chicken!!)

Have a great day...oh yeah....LOVE YOURSELF!!! (We Do!)

(whew! This is long!! I'm exhausted!!)

Heidi said...

Now see, I just knew my blogreaders would pick me up and you have. These five comments feel like 25 warm hugs with smiles. Thanks all. Just give me blogworld any day.

Thena said...

I agree with you on #5. Now that I'm older and beginning to realize what I put my Mom through in my rebellious years.

Mrs. E said...

Do not 2nd guess yourself! Just cultivate a relationship with your now adult and/or almost adult children. Learn to enjoy them and your relationship on the next level. You're going to be fine, Heidi!

Mari said...

Congrats to Skoots!
I agree with you on #5. My sisters and I were just saying that we really never realized how hard our Mom worked.

KrippledWarrior said...

Sorry my Blue Devils beat your Butlers.
How long have you been a spelunker in Kentucky?

Kathleen said...

I love Skoot's Mom's reaction to her winner status. Cracked me up! Whenever I visit her site, I can just picture her doing the "Boot Skootin' Boogie"! :)

Love the random thoughts. They sure give you insight into what makes people tick.

Blessings,
Kathleen

Heart2Heart said...

Heidi,

Yikes being in a cave would be super scary especially if there were bats inside that you could hear but not see.

Loved learning more about you.

Love and Hugs ~ Kat

Jientje said...

You worry too much!!

nancygrayce said...

My husband's grandmother did get an apartment and moved to the college her son was going to! I'll bet he wasn't so happy about that! :)

It seems to be very hard on some parents when their little chicks leave the nest. Honestly, I've been a mother since I was 18 and I may have been a little anxious as each left, but not sad.

Now, our youngest is graduating from college and coming home to live for a few months! When you are used to the empty nest, that is also a big adjustment!

Just feel your feelings knowing that All things work together!

Kim said...

#2 Yeah, me too. The list of foods that give me heartburn keeps getting longer and longer :-( Muy triste!
#4 We've worked their whole lives getting them ready to be independent but when it actually comes time for that, it's SO STINKIN' HARD. *sigh* But having "been there, done that" I am praying hard for you, sister-in-Christ!
Glad my truth-wrapped-in-humor answer to #12 helped yesterday :-) As a woman our emotions can be all over the place, and I've found it's gotten much worse during this stage of life. I've cried way more in the past five years than the first 46 combined. *sigh again* But I've had older women assure me it does get better :-) So hang in there, Heidi, and we'll all get through this together!

KD said...

Hubby mom gave some great advice over the years, but one of my favorites and one that I repeat often is: "I raised them right, what they do now is not my fault." I pray for my DDs every day (often multiple times a day) but I know that we modeled a good relationship, both hubby and I and our church families. So now ... we wait and see what crop is harvested. And enjoy each other. It will be OK Heidi, I promise! and God Promises...to everything there is a season....

Sandy said...

Heidi, I got to this post backwards through Thankful Thursday.
Just have to tell you I'm following you now, because I'm relating to you so much as a mom of grown kids. I was ready to go to work at 6:30 a.m. this morning, but then got sick, and now I have tears just continuing to flow, and I don't know why!
I know I'm not making any sense.
Just thank you for sharing honestly!

sanjeet said...

Blessings and prayers for a clam and peaceful spirit are heading your way!
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